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Physically Distant But Socially Close

3/29/2020

So this has been a really rough period for everyone. And for those less fortunate than us -- those in harder financial situations or homeless -- or our incredible medical professionals, they're really having a challenging time.

And it's hard to believe that it's going to get worse before it gets better.

As I sit here writing this, pondering what words of wisdom I could possibly leave you that may be helpful, here is what I came up with:

** STAY CONNECTED **

** STAY CLOSE **

** BE EASY ON YOURSELF **

** STAY CONNECTED **

It's especially important in this time to be extra connected to our loved ones. Whether it's more phone calls, video calls, zoom calls (!), FaceTime, whatever -- texts, all of it -- do stay in close touch with people.

Even video chat hangouts with coworkers at the end of the day is also highly recommended -- not necessarily to discuss work but just to stay connected and socialize!

** STAY CLOSE **

Right now I'm especially lucky to have 1 or 2 kitties that I can cuddle and pet and will make me burst out laughing at random times throughout my work day. For those of us who may be single or living on your own right now try to stay closely connected with at least 1 person. Is there 1 person you can go take walks with? Or at least who will check in on you and you on them?

** BE EASY ON YOURSELF **

Especially for those of us -- you know who you are! -- myself included, who already tend to be hard on ourselves before the current situation, it may be very tempting --again myself included-- to be even harder on ourselves now. As irrational as that may sound.

And so I am asking -- requesting -- nay, requiring of you, to be extra extra easy on yourself during this time. Find something-- again it can be small-- each day that gives you A Burst of Joy. Maybe it's an online zumba dance class. Maybe it's talking with an old friend. Or doing a little creative DIY artsy project. Like creating a new Word of the Day card:

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I will be creating more online journaling/self care gatherings! I look forward to seeing you then!
XO

Comment below if you have any other suggestions for online gatherings or any thoughts on this post!

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Slow Down Breathe and Don’t Touch Anything!

3/15/2020

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What a crazy week it has been. Granted the coronavirus situation has been going on for 2 months now when it first started in China just before the Lunar New Year. But it seems just in the last week that it has blown up for us in Boston and NYC.

I can still remember I was in Taiwan visiting family when it first started. And the WHO blatantly reported that it was certainly not a global emergency — it was only in China.

It’s been a hard week for many reasons. This is one of the first times that we’ve had such a global crisis at this level that affects basically every country, yet that is not a war. We actually have to try to come together and work together. Like the (3 female, 6 male) COVID-19 expert team that recently left China to assist efforts in Italy. It truly touches me. Medical staff putting themselves at risk and even helping others in other countries.

It’s certainly not been easy to not freak out though.

As my counseling group would say, it’s hard to not have this current situation trigger old feelings and fears from childhood around basic survival, and fighting for one’s life or irrational behavior around us.

INFORMATION OVERLOAD

Along with the daily stress of living in this situation is also trying to figure out how to balance getting useful information and getting mentally overwhelmed and emotionally drained. How much information is enough? How much is too much? At what point does it become more stressful than it is valuable?

It's easy to get sucked into the panic of wanting more information simply because one is scared. At that point, the smartest thing to do may be to either:

1. BREATHE (do calming, self-care activities)
2. PANIC (in a safe space with limited time constraints)
3. STOP READING/ABSORBING INFORMATION (for 8-12hr anyways)

In light of all of this, and everyone cancelling in person events, and since I have always been an advocate of gathering virtually anyways I will be holding Self-Care Gatherings online in this next period. See below for upcoming dates. And depending on the demand may hold them more frequently.

I really look forward to being with you! I think it's very important for us to get together during this unpredictable time that can bring up a ton of feelings and can be very isolating.

Meditative Self-Care Gatherings ONLINE :

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What About Your GOALS & DREAMS?

3/8/2020

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This month we'll be talking about your Goals & Dreams!

I've been thinking a lot lately about what I want to be doing with my life (when I grow up). JK! Obviously I am grown up -- and yet, the question still comes up for me -- WHAT DO I WANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE?

Or I guess, more specifically:

What do I want my days to look like?
Where do I want to spend different parts of the year?
Where do I want to spend the winter? The summer months?

How will I help take care of my parents as they get older?

Finally warm enough to take out a bike on my lunch break!

Yes, these are lifestyle questions. But they are also, of course, financial decisions. The more choice you want to have, generally the more money you'll need. Or even if you don't need more money per se, you do need to be more creative in thinking about how you are going to set up your dream lifestyle!

Have you taken the time to think about first, are you happy with where your life presently is now? Are you happy with where things are going? Let's just look at this year -- have you looked out for the next 9 months until December and made sure there are things you would like to plan? It can be personally (health, family, trips, etc) or professionally with your job.

My favorite independent bookstore -- Trident! How I love thee!

We will get into planning later, but for now I'd like you to just take out your journal, find a quiet hour or so, and just let your mind wander and go for dreaming BIG! What would you absolutely LOVE to have happen this year??

Add your thoughts in the comments below! I would love to hear what you're dreaming about! Or feel free to write me directly at shiuan @ shiuan butler dot com !

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Self-Love is the Basis for Great Overall Mental Health!

3/1/2020

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Self-Love is truly the basis on which everything else is founded. And I mean EVERYTHING.

From relationships to your daily mood or productivity and quality of sleep and getting up in the mornings.

Taiwanese bubble tea shop in Portland, Maine! Thanks C!

How does it affect every aspect of our lives so intrinsically? When we are truly valuing and appreciating ourselves, then we can make the right decision for ourselves. This includes things like, making sure others respect our time or boundaries, having a work life balance, making time for our health and exercise; setting up our relationships with others so that works well for us. When others see you respecting yourself in that way, they naturally will do the same. And if they see you not respecting your own boundaries, they will also not respect them.

Journaling Prompts:

1. What is one way that you can tell you truly value and love yourself?

2. What is one area that you can tell you could improve on and treat yourself better in?

* Let me know how it goes in the comments below! And for daily journaling support - check out Daily Dabbles!

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You are the one you have been waiting for.

Physically Distant But Socially Close

Slow Down Breathe and Don’t Touch Anything!

Meditative Self-Care Gatherings ONLINE :

What About Your GOALS & DREAMS?

Self-Love is the Basis for Great Overall Mental Health!

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