 That's right. You heard correctly. The other day I was dutifully writing out my 3 pages of Morning Pages (if you signed up for my newsletter I was talking about Julia Cameron's recommendation of MP) and I came upon this realization. Sunsets serve no practical function whatsoever, and admiring them actually TAKES YOUR TIME. But let me back up a bit.
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 There are lots of things that differentiates us from other mammals, and one of them is discipline. My definition of discipline is: having the self integrity and principle to stick to a pattern of behavior, usually from one's own willpower. If there's a goal that we really want to achieve, it usually takes hard work-- consistent effort -- which takes discipline-- to get there. Discipline is something that requires a vision of the long term; postponing short term gratification for future results. Discipline usually requires doing something, frequently and often, that one may not necessarily 'feel' like doing at that moment; but one does anyways. The latter part is crucial. I think of as discipline as growing strength of the mind. You really, truly believe in yourself to accomplish X, though you may have never done it before. You imagine yourself achieving it. You believe you're worth it. Discipline necessarily grows one's backbone. Having backbone: having principles or integrity. It's not about self-torture or being hard on yourself just for the hell of it. It's about taking yourself and your goals and dreams so seriously that you are absolutely focused 150% to attain it. You are determined. Determination is having the grit and persistence in pursuing a dream. Discipline is WHAT YOU NEED to do the daily actions to achieve it. It's attainable. It's just on the far distance of the desert; you can just see it there peeking out at you. It's there for the taking. If you want it bad enough. Are you ready to do what it takes to get there? With no one guaranteeing success except for the voice in your head saying: YOU CAN DO THIS. I WILL DO THIS OR ELSE. LET'S GO. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. What do you want in your life that bad? Anything? If you can't easily think of anything right now that you want really badly (specifics would also be helpful), go ahead and journal tonight or tomorrow morning on it. I would LOVE to hear how it goes!  It's been quite the adventure. Sure, I've done trans-Atlantic (Pacific?) moves before, from Boston to Hawai'i, barely knowing a soul. But somehow wrapping up a full-time job and leaving an apartment on the very same day, was as hard as I thought it would be! And as we all know, doing anything in NYC is more difficult and expensive than anywhere else. I didn't realize how stressed I was until I arrived here! But I actually wanted to start out this blog post with some self-appreciations: 1. PLANNING IN ADVANCE. With a really hectic and stressful move, I planned well in advance, down to little details like booking the cleaner in advance. And to make sure the move was as 'easy' for myself as possible, I even ordered boxes online instead of scrounging for them like I usually do. 2. SLOW DOWN AND NOTICE. Since arriving, I made an intentional decision to slow down and notice all the little things. Like the sweet fragrant air here. (Is it the cacti?) All the friendly people—when they’re not driving—and they actually give eye contact! How shocking. I noticed people are happy to chat and joke with strangers. Such a refreshing new experience for me. 3. LEAN IN TO MY GUT. I leaned into my intuition, and my gut, and tapped into how I felt-- what I need financially, but also emotionally and mentally. And I ended up saying no to a job that just didn’t feel right right now. I’m getting better at noticing what does feel right to me, and that's a great feeling.  4. TAKE A BREATH. Again, going with the flow, taking things one at a time, including not letting my partner’s restimulations (anxiousness) trigger me as well. Moving is not easy. And we’re all going to get triggered at some point. It doesn’t take a lot more energy to choose the high road (just a little humility!) and extend a little more patience in that moment. And the other person will appreciate it too, even if they can't say so right then. 5. FOCUSING ON ME. While other people around me may be arguing or getting stressed over minutiae, choosing to not let myself get sucked into their energy and little details. Instead, letting it roll over me like a pebble in the river, and choosing instead to focus on what is important to me. Making time for my creative business. Getting to the pool, even if for a brief swim. Making a delicious chai tea (Twinings!) and letting myself recover from an intense move, wrapping up a hectic full-time job, and taking things just one action item at a time. It feels so good to not rush and be rushed. I’m really pleased with myself and with my decision. And so excited to get to focus on me, my projects, my creativity, my self-care whether it’s my body, finances, relationships. I’m so grateful and excited to get to DO ME! Many of you out there may be thinking, well that's all fine for you, but what about the rest of us still on the hamster wheel day-in and day-out? You're not on a temporary vacation, but it's still the same challenges-- or opportunities-- we get to think about. Life is about finding our ME TIME, even whilst we're moms, or full-time professionals, or diving into the ins and outs of a new city. It is TOTALLY POSSIBLE! Thinking 'WHAT DO I NEED?' Whether it's Sunday night, Wednesday afternoon, or weekday mornings. Is it more exercise? Is it bringing more packed lunches to work? How can I set up my short weekend time, so I strike a balance of getting things I need to get done to prepare for the week AND also time to rejuvenate, relax and recharge with some real QUIET time? It inevitably means letting some things go (I won't get around to vacuuming this weekend), cutting some things out (no partying Saturday night so I can go row Sunday morning), and splurging on others (taking a cab to save me an hour on the train).  How can I set up my weekday mornings so I am ready to thrive during my workday and not dragging? Is it stretching in the mornings? Getting up a half hour earlier to do a guided meditation? Making smoothies in the mornings? It's also about KNOWING yourself well enough to know what you need when. I LOVE mornings. For me, having that ME TIME to myself in the morning is a key way for me to set off a busy day on the right foot. Equally important, what about my bedtime routines so that I am giving myself enough space (timewise and mental) to truly unwind (read fiction, no devices) so I can get a good quality of sleep? What does my body and mental health need after the usual lunch coma? Is it really more coffee? Or a walk outside and my favorite iced chai tea and a quick Starbucks break? YOUR ASSIGNMENT for this week is to try one--- JUST ONE-- new thing in your routine and see if it helps. It can be anything, as long as it makes you feel better in your week!
And.. I'd LOVE to hear how it goes! Feel free to add a comment below of what your new tweak in your routine is or for a little more privacy, email me at shiuan dot butler at g m a i l. Have a lovely week! |
About Shiuan
I love surfing, candles, and the beach at sunset. I love supporting women as they make time to recharge, relax, and realize their dreams!. Archives
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This site contains affiliate links, which means I will earn an affiliate commission for any purchases you make. My goal with Journaling Sisters is to support, inspire, and nurture women to ultimately find their desires and themselves. Thank you for supporting me to do so! I only promote those products or services that I have investigated and truly feel deliver value to you. |
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